On August 23rd 2021, my dear friend Jennifer (Abegg) Grant went home to be with Jesus. It has been one year since her incredible husband, Kevin, lost the love of his life. For one year her five children have learned a new normal, life without their mother. John and Betsy Abegg have journeyed 365 days without their beautiful daughter. Her siblings have lived a year without their sister. Family and friends have journeyed 12 months without Jennifer on earth.
During the days and weeks leading up to this anniversary I found myself remembering a mix of old and newer memories. Jennifer and I were close friends for exactly two decades. We were single and served as missionaries together in Orlando, Florida and were roommates for a season. In recent years we connected by phone calls, text messages, Marco Polo video messages and the occasional visit to Ponca City, Oklahoma and sweet visits in Scottsdale, Arizona during her season of cancer treatments.
Today I treasure wonderful memories with Jennifer and many stories that bring tears to my eyes from gut-busting laugher! Our stories seem interwoven from the years of friendship and the years we prayed with and for each other. I have memories of prayer walking with Jennifer in the early 2000s and memories of praying on our knees in a little town house when we were both single. As my single journey extended longer than our mutual friends, she even recruited her children to pray for my now husband.
After finally marring the man of my dreams and then getting pregnant (years after most of my friends had children) I was finally going to join the ever exclusive moms club. While Jennifer was intentional to include me and remain close to me even after she got married and had babies, I didn’t exactly fit in her mom world. Mom was something Jennifer did especially well.
During my pregnancy she shared many gems of wisdom. My heart was filled with eager anticipation about the coming season of being a new mom with a seemingly super-mom friend like her. Sadly, God didn’t allow us to share such a season together. My baby boy was born two weeks after she went home to be with Jesus. Today I don’t have the luxury of calling her with questions or text messages with scriptures and prayer requests.
Jennifer’s husband shared shortly after her home-going, that when they first received the cancer diagnosis, they recorded the conversation of the two of them processing the news. Below is an excerpt from their blog:
In the video, Jennifer says, “If this cancer is to bring glory to Jesus, then amen! I just want to keep lifting high the name of Christ. He’s got this. He has everything under control. I wouldn’t plan to take the mom of five kids, but I fully believe that the Lord knows how He’s doing things. And if the Lord takes me away to heaven, then He also has a plan for how things are going to work after I’m gone — and it’s a good plan. God is the Author of life. He numbers our days before we live one of them. I embrace His plan – and I praise Him in it. God is big enough to handle all of the messy factors that result from the outworking of His will and He can make it beautiful in the end. https://journalistmomblog.com/2021/10/19/division-fractions/
I read one word over and over and thought to myself, She said AMEN? Essentially her response to the cancer diagnosis and all it could hold was that I’m here for whatever lifts the name of Almighty higher. And if it brings God glory, I say let it be so! Jennifer said yes and amen to God’s will and trusted that if it was His plan, it would be good. As my little family of three embarked on the hardest days we’ve ever known, Jennifer’s YES and AMEN resounded in my soul. Like the man in the New Testament who said to Jesus, Lord I believe, help my unbelief.” Many times this year I've prayed, Lord I say Yes and amen, help me say yes and amen! The loss of Jennifer is tremendous. But even in death, her life still gifts impact on my journey. And so today I remember. I remember being young and having fun with Jennifer. I remember laughing so hard that I couldn't get understandable words out of my mouth. I remember Bible studies and praying on our knees with our faces in the carpet. I remember travel adventures, Loveland Colorado, ministry endeavors, celebrations, Dunkin Donuts coffee, homemade salad dressing, pearls, dresses, high tea and uncountable long conversations. I remember a friend so special I will always treasure her memories in my heart. Today on this first anniversary of her faith becoming sight, I remember that when she faced the unthinkable, she said amen.
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